|
SITE OF THE MONTH
Another site maintained by Hider and Sam. I don't think I've ever heard of a completely Literati-based fan fiction awards site. Have you? Start nominating, kids!
WRITING CONTEST
PLUG YOUR FICS!
Powered by TagBoard Message Board
|
Vindicated by secretstar and arianna
Link to story.
Plot
Oh, man. Once these two kids join forces... wow. And you thought they were already wonderful authors separately to begin with.
Vindicated is the end of Rory and Jess, but thanks to the bitterness ASP has previously handed over to us, this isn't one of those fluffy pieces. The two lovebirds meet again after a long while, but it's under circumstances that neither they, nor we, least expect.
Rory and Jess are hardly lovebirds in this story. It's tragic and poignant, and honestly, this sad tone can only suit a Literati story.
Alcohol is involved, and so is sex. Written with such sensitivity and sharpness.
Now this is a good story.
Characterization
The tension that somehow creeps in whenever Jess and Rory are in a room together is so tangible here.
At one side, we have Jess. His cynicism, his bitterness towards Rory, oh man--jackpot. Claim your money at the counter. I think it's very much like Jess to keep something like this close to his heart, but once given the opportunity to smooth it out, he shuts down.
Rory in this story is particularly well done. Despite the time that has passed, she is still the same naive and denial-filled girl. Every move she made and every dialogue she uttered fit her perfectly. Rory is always the one to jump into a potentially ruined life in exchange for something so insipid, like a marriage without truth.
I think this sentence just sums up their relationship at this point:
"He keeps his gaze down, knowing he will catch her staring if he looks up. He doesn't want to risk it."
Style/Flow
I love the distinct style that you work with in general. There's a voice in the writing, and whether it be Rory's or Jess's, it's still there, and it pulls us readers into Vindicated.
The flashbacks are excellently done. While most authors who use this device only end up confusing their audience, you pull it off very well. What happened in the bar and what's happening in the present is given a clear division, but is still part of one story.
Structure/Grammar/Spelling
I think you guys did a great job at this department. There is balance in the structure, so it did not leave me hanging or drowsy (seriously, some fics tend to do that).
Grammar and spelling: pff, you guys are probably better at this than me.
I did notice a typo, however:
"He moves in, hears the faceless girl's muffled scream..."
But that's it. :)
Things To Work On
Looking back, I think that there's just too many fics going around that just state the characters as "he" and "she." (I've been guilty of this myself--haha.) It works just great, but it's just too overused, and I guess I'm just giving a general heads up for future fics.
Things That Rocked My Socks
Uh. Copying and pasting the whole story will make this waaay too long of a review.
I love the detail, the plot, the alcohol and the sex. If I could marry this story, I would.
Letter Grade
A++ :)
Reviewed by:
Oregano
back
|
